Anyhow in the last month the topic of mpreg has come up in two different professional m/m communities (though with a lot of cross over one would imagine). Both ended up either being locked or deleted and apologies offered by the moderators because members of the community felt unsafe and/or marginalized. To me this is appalling. I don't even understand why this is even necessary to discuss. Mpreg belongs in fanfic. Just leave it there (I suppose if you're writing SF and the males carry the baby that's different but that's not most of M/M romance in the professional setting.
I have never liked Mpreg, that's no secret, not even in fandom. To me, it's a way of fetishizing gay men and not really honoring their reality. And basically the giant arguments were to that end, many gay men saying PLEASE don't do this. They shouldn't have had to say it more than once but naturally they did. I see this as the women writing gay men confirming their worst fears, that we have no respect for them, have no idea what it's like to be a gay man and are just profiting from them. There are enough voices decrying women writing gay men without adding fuel to the fire.
Here's the thing: if people within the community you're trying to write about are telling you it's offensive and insulting, IT IS offensive and insulting, end of story. This is just widening the gap between groups. We're expected now to write diversely. (I just read an article and damn I should have bookmarked it that said if you don't have a gay and minority character your story is inherently homophobic and racist. Obviously that's moronic, swinging too far to one side). But we're hit on both sides, told we're prejudice if we aren't diverse and told we're doing it wrong and our writing it is unwanted because we're not in the community. Trying to force Mpreg into mainstream writing just reconfirms how wrong we are.
And oh, yeah, I stayed out of the arguments in both communities because I knew how it would end. Be respectful. If you want a baby in the story, adopt, find a surrogate, something a gay man could feasibly do.
As always have some writing links
From others besides Betty: Flying without a Net
Writing 3-D characters I used to do this ALL the time. I need to get back to it. I find it helpful because I'll be the one who forgets details (like seriously couldn't remember which arm Aaron lost when it came time to talk to my cover artist).
the importance of reviews and how to handle them
And thanks to Betty we have: 6 problems with long series I don't always agree with Mythcreants (often I feel their writers are very young and miss the point half the time) but this one is pretty good.
marketing cheat sheet
what’s a bisac code?
social media vs author website
creating an eclectic magic system This is very good
surviving a confidence crisis I feel that using friends too often thing.
Yearly Word Count - 25768 / 100000 words. 26% done!
Splinters of Silver - editing nothing
Blood Red - waiting for edits
editing 3 novellas - edited 2/3rds of Cassadaga
Behind Blue Eyes - nothing
Haunted Hocking - 10215 / 60000 words. 17% done!
Steampunk Deadwood - planning stages